Scientifically Accurate Santa Claus


Wed, Dec 18th, 2013 10:00 by capnasty NEWS

If Santa Claus was real, lugging 300,000 tons of toys for a whopping 91 million children, travelling at an average speed of 3,000 times the speed of sound, Christmas would be a very scary holiday. Wait, did she just say "reindeer dicks"?

Santa's Christmas Eve journey would be a global catastrophe. Thankfully, Santa isn't real! Or we would all be dead.



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