If you've been online long enough you've seen the goatse image, a picture of a man stretching his anus to a size large enough to comfortably park a Dodge Caravan with space to spare.
Adrian Chen of Gawker got curious as to who the ass belonged to. Most importantly, he wanted to know how could someone's anus stretch far and wide across the Internet. Well, Adrian found his man, partly thanks to comparing butt moles.
The story of Goatse begins with a mustachioed, wiry man in his late forties who goes by the name "Kirk Johnson." Johnson is a prominent practitioner of extreme penetration, which is the extreme penetration community's term of art for sticking huge objects up your ass. For years, Johnson has been rumored to be the Goatse man, based on their similar frame, skills, and matching moles on both Goatse's and Johnson's ass.
Reader, I examined the moles. They match.
That, right there, is dedication.
|Thousands Pledge to Quit Facebook|
|China Bans Search Term 'Occupy'|
|WiFi -- Why Are We All Still Paying for This?|
|“Tech is like the tobacco industry.”|
|Forecast: Facebook to Lose 80% of Users by 2017|
|“A driverless electric truck began daily freight deliveries on a public road.”|
|CaptchaTweet: Write Tweets in Captcha Form|
|U.S.S. Enterprise Owner's Manual|
|Naked Preacher Lady [NSFW]|
|Fake Name Generator|
|The (Very Scary) People of Public Transit|
|Recycled Vacuum Lamps|
|Creepstream: Looking at Insecure Camera Feeds From Around the World|
|“A new residential building under construction will feature a flying car skyport on the roof.”|
|iPhone 6, the First Smartphone to Disrupt NSA's Spying|
|“Earth will always be unique and living here prized.”|
|“You can often hide from an AI video system with the aid of a simple color printout.”|