Welcome to Issue 7 of CoN. This issue is almost in time. It was actually ready before the day it was due, but for some reason it seemed a little bit too early to send. Maybe it is. Maybe it isn't. At this point, I don't know.
IGNORE the HYPE writes in regards to Samantha's top ten list:
Here's my top ten list:
TOP TEN REASONS WHY I HATE TOP TEN LISTS10. They're stupid9. They're not funny8. They're stereotypical7. They use dated material6. Even Letterman's aren't funny anymore5. They accomplish nothing4. They waste bandwidth3. They are shallow at best2. They are insulting at worstAnd the #1 reason WHY I HATE TOP TEN LISTS:1. They are last refuge of those that have nothing to say
Uh, oh yeah, ignore this list too. It's also stupid. <g>
Jackson Michael writes in regards to Davinder Sangha's "Men? MEN? We no need no stinkin' men!"
The writer of this piece seems sincerely angry at men, and she mayhave every reason to, but as a reader (and, admittedly, as a guy),I'm compelled to ask:
What happened after she kissed her cousin? ;)
Davinder Sangha (who is also, to my horror, my girlfriend) replies:
To answer your question, when my cousin kissed me on my sexy lips I felt an electrical wave go through my body. My cousinand I had great sex compared to my boyfriend. Therefore, sincethis incident occurred I've realized that I may be a lesbian or Bi-sexual. Bye bye Leo and hello Pat!
I'll leave you with this issue which is nothing more than an attack against vile stupidity, in it's own stupid way. Hope you enjoy it.
Capital of Nasty looks forward to your feedback. To send feedback, hit reply to this issue. You will not be made fun of in our next editorial. Honest.
|May the Condoms Be With You|
|Brothel offers 'green' discount|
|"Making sex toys and selling them on Kickstarter is hard."|
|“The Amazon Dash button for horny men and women who don’t feel comfortable telling their partner they’d like to have sex.”|
|The Conspiracy Behind Girlfriends|
|“It knows the very contours of my face.”|
|“What if we could create our own miniature sun here on earth?”|
|The (Very Scary) People of Public Transit|
|How to Avoid Jury Duty|
|CaptchaTweet: Write Tweets in Captcha Form|
|If Sir David Attenborough Restored Vintage Toys|
|“Self-driving vans are actually the least novel-seeming part of the unveiling.”|
|Recycled Vacuum Lamps|
|“When Life Gives You Lemons.”|
|Fake Name Generator|
|Pat the Zombie: A Cruel Adult Spoof of 'Pat the Bunny'|
|“The company is losing billions, has essentially no underlying value, and its business could be hammered overnight.”|