THE KINGDOM - Written by Jeff Wright

If all tv was like this, we wouldn't need cinema. The 1994 Danish mini-series directed by BREAKING THE WAVES director Lars Von Trier, about a haunted hospital that is wildly funny and in parts, downright spooky.

Anal-retentive Stuck-up Pedantic Uncut Mothers - Written by Lilith DemHareIs

We recently moved. We bought a house. We moved everything out of the old cramped flat, into the new spacious house. Time to clean the old place.

Marx, Engels, Trotsky, and Tinky Winky - Written by Jester

Quite recently, Televangelist Reverend Jerry "Chuckles" Falwell published a report in the National Liberty Journal stating that Tinky Winky, one of the characters on the Teletubbies, was gay.

Editorial - Written by capnasty

WELCOME to issue four of volume four of CoN. Our delay this week can be easily blamed to last week's: too much to do. While school is entertaining as I have mastered the skills of sleeping with my eyes open, of selective hearing and regurgitating what a professor wants to hear, I am beginning to suffer from the side effects of sleep-deprivation and too much coke and caffeine.

Duckism - Written by Neux

Well, when you said that the subject this time around would be philosophy, I decided I had to contribute my somewhat unique take on things. You see, since October or so I have been conducting a philosophical experiment.

ON THE EVE OF THE FUTURE - Written by Joe Tomorrow

This is our history. I still remember the day it happened -- March 3, 2013. At 11:15 in morning it was announced simultaneously around the world the Bill Gates' personal net worth had exceeded the national debt of the United States and in a hostile, but unchallenged takeover, achieved through absorption and complex stock splits, the United States became an incorporated, wholly owned subsidiary of Microsoft.