The Rise and Fall of the Houseman - Written by REVSCRJ

Okay now, this "face" job required I don one so thick I was like a soothing automaton of pure upper-class public service. Truly repulsive--felt like a pane of Plexiglas between me and my soul.

Feline in the Fields - Written by Sean B. Palmer

I live in Piltingdon, a beautiful hamlet located roughly sixty miles off of the edge of my roadmap. A place as quiet as it is remote, Piltingdon's local economy consists solely of our duck pond, into which people lose more money each year than NASA does on its rocket launches.

Eat Healthy, Die Anyway - Written by Smitty-boy

As I you may know, nobody lives forever. For those who don't, you?re going to die. No, that?s not a threat, so please refrain from a lawsuit (but if you must the average settlement is you kicking me in the nuts really hard).

Girls Gone Vile - Written by Lisa Stager

I have given up on late night television. Sure, the programming sucks major smegma - there is only so much a person can tolerate of Jack, Janet, and Chrissy engaged in the 1970's version of comical misunderstanding, all at three o'clock in the morning - but that's not what I'm talking about.

Mister Mugs Has Been Found - Written by Jester

Five years ago I submitted an article to CoN detailing how, during a bout of depression, I began a search for Mr. Muggs. Mr. Muggs, being the hero sheepdog of a series of books I read as a child at St.

Dead Trees in the Dirty Ground Sung to the tune of Dead Leaves and the Dirty Ground by The White Stripes - Written by John Iadipaolo

I wrote these lyrics while planting trees up in Northern Ontario. Basically it's a song for people who like tree planting, and who also like The White Stripes.