If you have ever wondered about what the people in the Human Resources department do, you may want to read this article on xojane. Written anonymously by someone who has spent way, way too much time doing this job, it recalls some of the most disturbing encounters -- or downright fascinating, if you ask me -- they have had to deal, from interviews, firings to flatulence interventions.
For the past 20 years (wow that hurts to type) I have worked in HR. I have hired hundreds of people, fired my fair share and laid off far too many. I have listened to people cry, bitch, moan, and scream. It's the best job ever.
I love people. People are messy, unpredictable, predictable, mean, caring, nasty, and unbelievable. All in the same day. It's my job to help the ?human? element of a company perform at maximum efficiency. All this, and I play a killer game of buzzword bingo.
When I am not optimizing the bandwidth of my employer?s human capital or socializing a new message on a granular level (BINGO!), these are some of the deep thoughts that run through my brain.
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|“That’s why Colorado School of Mines decided it was time for students to learn how to tap celestial bodies for all they’re worth.”|
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|“What if there was a thermostat that allowed you to turn down the temperature of the Earth whenever you wanted.”|
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|“Lifting the electric motors out of Teslas and putting them in the chassis of other, formerly gas guzzling cars.”|
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|“What can we do to make responsible use of plastic a reality? First: reject the lie.”|
|Why, Typewriters Are Alive and Well, Thank you|
|“Rejuvenation is Finally an Industry.”|
|Go the Fuck to Sleep: A Children's Bedtime Book|