Rod Hilton's Guide on How to Watch All of Star Wars Without Hating Yourself or George Lucas

The Machete Order


Tue, Feb 28th, 2012 21:00 by capnasty NEWS

It's comforting to know that I am not the only one disappointed by what George Lucas has done with the prequel and to the original trilogy. Would you believe it that this nerd was debating whether my new born daughter should ever be introduced to Star Wars? I know! But why subjucate my children to the horrors of Jar Jar Binks and a whiny Darth Vader that says "yipee!"? Pass the Star Trek DVDs, please.

To the rescue comes Rod Hilton who, with his lengthy (very lengthy but worth it) guide, proposes different viewing options in order to bring new Star Wars viewers into the fold while reducing their pain and annoyances to the maximum. His suggestion: the Machete Order.

The problem with Episode Order is that it ruins the surprise that Vader is Luke's father. If you think that this reveal doesn't matter since it's common knowledge, I suggest you watch the looks on these kids' faces. This reveal is one of the most shocking in film history, and if a newcomer to the series has managed to avoid having it spoiled for them, watching the films in Episode Order would be like watching the ending of The Sixth Sense first.

The other problem with Episode Order is that the prequels don't really have a story. They're just background for the real story, which is Luke's attempt to destroy the Empire and save his father. Watching 3 films of backstory is boring if you've never seen the films they're the background to. Hell, that's why George Lucas made A New Hope first, he knew if he started with Episode I he'd never be able to complete the series. Starting someone off with Episode I is a surefire way to ensure they don't make it through the entire franchise.



You may also be interested in:

CGI Can't Beat Matte Painting
Bring back Jar Jar
"Why would I make any more [Star Wars movies], when everybody yells at you all the time and says what a terrible person you are?"
How "The Force Awakens" Special Effects Were Made
Star S'Mores, Sesame Street Parody of Star Wars