Striped stockings saved my life!
Today, I ran out of gas on the highway.
Thank god, I dressed appropriately.
Sweater knit tank top,
jean shorts,
thigh-high stockings with black and white horizontal stripes,
and 4 inch heels.
I didn't have my cell phone with me.
Thank god, I dressed appropriately.
It took all of two minutes to flag down a man.
Who stopped because he was a good Samaritan.
Of course.
Of course it was the stockings.
And so, he let me use his cell phone.
And I called the CAA.
And I was very gracious.
To both of them, of course.
And the nice man who stopped
because he was a good Samaritan
put his tongue back into his mouth and got back into his car.
And so I waited for the tow truck.
And waited, and waited.
And then a tow truck came.
But grrrr, it wasn't from the CAA.
And so, he put his tongue back in his mouth and got back into his truck.
He was a disgusting slob of a beast anyway.
And I didn't have any cash. So I waited for the CAA.
And the fuckers didn't come!!!!!
So I got out of my car, looking for the CAA.
And another truck stopped.
It was the stockings.
Of course.
He was a landscape guy.
Landscape guys have lawnmowers in their trucks.
Lawnmowers need gas.
Joy!
The nice lawnmower guy gave me free gas.
It was the stockings.
Of course!
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